Spoiled, Liquid Gold-my breastfeeding post

I can't believe this day has finally come.  20 weeks pregnant has brought on a new, improved Kate.  I am nesting like no woman ever should.  I just tackled the Deep Freezer.  Do recall my previous Liquid Gold Post; much earlier, Jude was around 3 months.  At that time, I had a decent stash.  And by decent, I mean a stash no woman would ever need to use.  See for yourself :

                                                  641.75 ounces stored at the age of 3 months.

And then here's the progression to May:

                      All in the new deep freezer!  Not sure on ounce increment here...A LOT?

And crap, I can't believe I didn't take a current one!  Well, I will tell you this, after about 1100 ounces, I stopped counting.  So then there's today.  The big 20 week mark and I spent my time cleaning out that deep freezer.  What an emotional time.  All the hours, pump pieces, baggies, bottles, and pain.  All down the drain.  My liquid gold is now spoiled rotten gold.  I have trashed 1000 ounces...Bare with me, I did take a great amount of picture that is clearly not needed.

                                              It's NOT true what they say about "Hefty" bags.

I will say it was very sad to trash all that; however, on a brighter note, I managed to pump in Sept/Oct and therefore have 95 ounces that will be technically "good" for new baby!  Can you believe it!  What a start! :)

                                                                95 ounces of GOLD

 So where do I stand with new baby?!  I thought I'd do a little experiment and try a fully, formula fed baby.  Don't you think it'll be interesting to see the developmental and intellectual differences between Jude and Baby!?  HA. I can't even type that without smiling.  No, I have every intention of doing exactly what I did for Jude.  Pumping extra during that 4 am feeding to ensure baby will get the best.  Without having to do an intern, go to class, and let's face it, I won't be a mall walking mama with two, I plan to pump and then each month donate.  I would have done this last time BUT I failed to write the time, date, year, etc on every freezer bag.  They are VERY particular of donations, makes sense.  But I guess time will tell what happens.  It'd also be great to not pump at all....hmmm.

On a side note, our 20 week celebration of half baked has been outstanding!  Nice early rise, visit from Great Grandma and Grandma, AND as I was writing this, fetus gave me a giant kick.  To which I actually SAW from outside.  Oh let the good times begins! 

Why do I smell like ice-cream!?!?

20 Weeks Baked

Baked.  Makes me think of sweets, makes me think GIRL b/c I'm not sweet.  Never really was though.  But really, girl.  Dreams=girl.  Thoughts=girl.  Okay, this is subject to change next week.

I googled 20 weeks pregnant and found all these pictures of huge pregnant bellies, gender reveals, baby names, nursery's, what they are craving, what they are not craving, what they can't do, what they want to do, etc.  I know with Jude's pregnancy I started reporting weight, craving, etc, but let's be honest, that did NOT last long.  Life goes on.  You get a bigger belly each week, you live life.  I have no cravings, turn offs, nursery to report, limitations, or things I want to do.  I will tell you this intern can not end soon enough because I hate leaving Jude and let's be more honest, it's stupid.  I'm fully capable of counseling a 13 year old.  When the time comes, I'll rock it.

Speaking of intern.  My class is going to a BAR for our last class.  A BAR!  Really?!  Ugh.  So I have complied a list of excuses, which do you think is best :

A: I'm a recovering, pregnant alcoholic and do not feel that would be the best environment for my situation; see my nicotine patch...
B: My child has an ear infection? (Works every time right?)
C: I am not comfortable being around second hand smoke b/c of the fetus.
D: I hate alcohol, smoke, and bars.  Three strikes, I'm out.
E: I have made NO effort to know anyone in the class so I'd only be the outcast at the bar.
F: 11's a crowd, 10's is much better.
G: I don't eat dinner or drink foundation sodas.
                                       or
H: At my very first course at Umsl, the professor invited us to Chevy's for the last class....I skipped that.
I feel as though for my very last course at Umsl, I need to skip the last class (at the bar) because it's the same concept. 

Yea, she's bound to understand one.  I'm not sure which is best at this point. Mu ah ah ah.


Or maybe I'm just really sad with work.  Here I am making up excuses for myself evil self.  Ha.  I really got to know and love this 8th grader.  Well the counselor I work with texted me last night saying his cancer is back :( He has had treatment, been in remission and now, one step back.  I feel so badly for him and his family.  He came in on Tuesday though (Just found out Monday about it returning) and his spirit is so uplifting.  He is one of the strongest 13 year old I've ever met.  Love this kid.  Makes me feel as though I take too much granted.  I should be so happy with what I have. 

Jude has become a parrot overnight.  Crazy.  He tried or says everything that comes out of my mouth.  It's amazing and so cute!  Good thing another is on the way, this one is growing up too fast. 

                                    Yea man! Yes, we wear skeleton jammies in April.  Don't you?

                                                  Totally cheesy right!  You know I love cheese! 

                                               20 weeks.  Finally...baby is growing in my butt. 

               Woah, ignore my scary corked head pose.  I was just trying to give you the full package :)

                                                Go go go!  So big, no need for help anymore!

            Oh man...Looks like a bad traffic jam.                     Ready, set, GO!!!!!! Says this 24/7.

Woah, these all just sorta loaded next to eachother!  So the first, he's such a big boy going down the slide all by himself!  The next one is from our nature hike with the scary "Ducks!"  Third one, Jude saying "beep beep!" Fourth one Jude saying "Bubble bath!" Such a smart child! I wouldn't expect anything less though. 



Cheers.

Poor sick baby

Well, out of no where Jude got a fever yesterday.  He reminds me so much of John.  He was so sad, cuddly, whiny and pathetic.   He did not want to do his normal things: go get the mail with me, take a bath, or even watch Barney, his new best friend.  He just wanted to whine :( But don't worry after some Advil kicked in, he bounced back last night.  Even said two new words.  Went to bed, no problems!

He woke up okay this morning.  A little sad really.  Broke my heart.  So we went to Walgreens and bought a better thermometer, tylenol, and a toy car.  I couldn't resist.  He was making car sounds as I put him in carseat so he's not that sick :)

I remember when I was sick one time my mom went out and bought me this mini, plaid backpack. I think I still have it....It made me feel better.  So thank you mom for those great memories!  Granted I was about 10, not 18 months, but oh well.  He was excited and has been playing with it all day. 

His fever was also a great excuse to turn on the air :)  Oh I had every intention of making pancakes this am too, but to my surprise, we have no milk, so we also got some hot cakes from McDonald's which he loves.  He's napping now.  I'm nesting and updating you.  Hope he wakes up well rested! 

                        There's just nothing worse than a sick baby.  Wish I could have the fever.

                                                      He's actually asleep like this on me...

Well better get moving before he starts to stir. 

19 WEEKS!! Where has the time gone!?

19 week

Just about half way. Woah, that went fast. I can only imagine how fast these next 20 weeks will go. Had our doctor appointment and ultrasound today. Everything is perfect. Baby was very active at first and then got sleepy. She got everything she could measure in 70 minutes but one artery. Even had me get up and pee half way through to see if baby would shift. It did, but still sleepy. Sooo we have to go back in 4 weeks to get that artery shot. We told her in the beginning we did not want to know gender but asked if she could put pictures or even just write gender down and put in my yellow envelope. "Sure, no problem." Here comes the end, and the lazy babe is sleeping cross legged and won't move, or so she told us. So there ya go! A shy baby. She said "sorry I have no idea what to tell you." Oh well, it's not like we really need to know or wanted to look at envelope. Ha. After all, Jude's just sat in the doctor office for the last 20 weeks. Baby measured at 9 oz and 19w3d or pretty much right on. Exactly where it should be at this time. Then we had my doctor appointment. Measured still at 110lbs, belly at 18 cm, and heartbeat around 150-160 he said. So well go back in mid May. Here's our cute, adorable, but yet scary fetus at this time.

Here's a good 3d of fetus.  Face on left side. See forehead, nose, eyes, lips.

Head of left side, arm up by nose, body.

 You're doing what today!?

Not sick, just hot baby. Cuddle time. He was so funny and just crawled on up! So sweet. Laid with me for a few minutes.

His favorite race track!

Race Car Track! Zooooom!

Well, someone did not have a good nap, so we turned on Rio and "laid down"...meaning jumped up to dance to songs.

Oh poor child. Yep two strollers on either side and our new tv stand above his head. Good thing we only went a few miles.

Uma's been CHALKED!

THIS perfectly displays Jude. A great love for EVERYONE. This is beautiful Hannah cuddling with Jude. Yes, they have only met about 3 times :)

Goofy.

Maybe he does love me. After only getting to spend the car ride to my moms together, I finally picked him up later in the afternoon and we had a great night (work day). He would NOT stop jabbering and then busting up with laughter. THIS isn't enough close to the real conversation we had :) He talked to me for another 20 minutes before I realized he's not going to stop, I might as well try and videotape him! He was being so goofy! Love this monster!

Cheers!

Tuesday Post

Might as well just go with the daily posts.

Ran to Target today. Jude was styling. As usual. Cool BLUE loafers, plaid, mainly BLUE shorts, monster truck on his shirt, and he just so happen to be making car sounds while I checked out.

And the checker asks "Can SHE have a sticker?!" I was stunned. Didn't say anything back. Then she repeated TWO more times, "Can SHE have a sticker?!"

Okay, okay, let me examine, there has to be a reason, umm is he holding a doll? No, car, check. Girly squeal? No, making car sounds, check. Young girl around that she is actually talking to? No, just Jude, check. Wearing glasses maybe she's nearly blind? No, no glasses. What am I buying, girl tihngs? No, toy car, BLUE shirt, check. Ummm, Jude has only been mistaken as a girl 2 times his entire life, sorry Jude, we're up to 3 times now.

Monday Night Class

I must be bored due to the continuous posts. OH well you love it...

I realized tonight at class that I don't know anyone's name. Yep, they know mine. It's a very intimate setting really. We sit in a circle and go around talking about our triumphs, struggles, counseling kids, supervisors...and then there's me who just talks about whatever will make my professor happy that week. Really I have a list where I switch off topics weekly to make sure I "cover all grounds." Yep. What a slacker I've become. OR genius. Why don't more people do this? Orrrr everyone does does this and it took me 4 years to realize it?

We also decided that at the next class meeting we would do mock interviews. To which I replied to my professor, "I don't plan to get a job for 5+ years, so am I exempt?!" She laughed and said I will lose all my skills after 5 years. I laughed and said "You doubt my brilliance?!" That is a typical Monday night class. Only 2 left.

Mall brat, grass season, and HOLY COW I'm PREGNANT!

Mall brat:

I met Becky at the mall on Saturday. After the rain cleared up, it really tuned into a nice day. We started at the kids play place thing because I obsess over Jude and feel the need to make every activity I do as kid friendly as possible. He started with a huge smile, which is what every mother wants to see. Then more and more hoodlums come to "play." I'm sorry but I have decided that A: If your child is over 5 there is NO need to be in this very-small kid friendly "playground" (if you've ever seen it it's stuff for them to climb on, a car to turn the steering wheel, and a mini slide), B: If you're over the age of 8 I should be allowed to kick you out, C: IF and WHEN you run into MY son, you DO NOT run past without acknowledging your much intended shove through him. I then comforted Jude and yes I thought this, "If she does it again, pull those crazy, untamed pigtails of hers Jude." Needless to say, I will NOT be visiting the mall on a weekend and taking him to the "playplace" which I now will refer to as "hoodlum headquarters."

This all leads to me to think it's a girl. Usually I'd just brush this off and see it as a teaching time. "Oh Jude, you're okay, things happen." Nah, I am evil. Pure evil that day. Isn't another old wives tale that a girl will take all your "sweetness" away. Let's hope that the case and I haven't turned for good. Ha.

Grass cutting is bittersweet.

Sweet because that counts as my exercise, it's was so nice outside today (the fresh air, sun, never gets old), and just relaxing. It's nice to feel those braxton hicks and chug water. Bitter because I look in the door to see a screaming, banging Jude :( Oh my it broke my heart. Then they came outside. I thought that may calm him. Distract with toys and yet he can be closer to me. Nope. Screaming at my feet. Bitter. Needless to say, him and John had to go to the basement to play until I was done. Sad.

Holy cow, I'm pregnant.

Here I am this morning.

NOW

THEN

Comparable to a small calf? Here are my list of excuses. Well, I did eat cupcakes yesterday, I have been exceptionally lazy while Jude naps, this is the second baby, and etc. I mean, sigh I'm just not ready to actually look pregnant. I don't mind being pregnant right now. BUT I'd like a few more weeks. Or maybe I'm just carrying differently? Different genders carry different?! OH yes, let's go with that. I look higher...as of now at least. Jude's pic is much lower. I guess you really do show sooner than with your first. I like to think I look more "athletic" this time around though. A bit wimpy with Jude. Or maybe it's going to be a really fat, chubby baby! You know, maybe next week I'll take it from further away. This is a close up ya know, think I can look a bit smaller then?! Ha! Yep, there he or she is. Ready to break through!!

Have I mentioned this FRIDAY is our scan. Pray everything goes well and that the fetus looks amazing! Thanks in advance. Nothing like seeing that fetus for 60 minutes! I can't wait!!! We're so excited. I was tossing around the idea of finding out this time around, HOWEVER, we have decided against it. So you and I will have to wait 20 more weeks to see what this trouble maker is!

Cheers.

Cupcakes!!!

Jude and I wanted to make cupcakes.

Okay, no, you know, let's be honest. I threw him in bed early because let's face it, he only wants to throw the batter everywhere and not actually "help." I made these delicious cupcakes but then forgot about the last 6! UGH. Pregnancy Brain? It's not like me to forget about something sweet to consume. I guess 18 is enough anyways. Then I proceed to sneeze and pee a slight bit on myself. Ugh. Not my day, just can't win.

Green Bean Casserole

Oh and I might add....NEVER a bright idea to listen to a fetus. Granted, with these two pregnancies, I seem to fail at this.

8 PM last night. Jude in bed, stomach rumbling. Oh course I just went shopping early that day but I just could NOT, for the life of me, decide what I wanted. Wait! I see french dried onions in the pantry....what is that!? A recipe on the back, 2 cans of bean CHECK, onions well duh CHECK, mushroom soup (!!) GROSS CHECK. BOOM 8:30 PM my master piece is created. I've never even made this before! It was to. die. for.

Thank you fetus for delicious green bean casserole. Until you speak again!

18 Weeks and Easter

Ah, creepy picture right!? Ha. Fetus is HIGHLY active. Moving constantly! Must be a big fetus because it rolls, kicks, stabs, already everywhere. But I mean, I do have a sweet potato in my stomach so it all makes sense now :)

Jude, John and I were all spoiled rotten for Easter. It was fabulous. I had a light week really. Class Monday night, ONLY 3 LEFT!!!!, worked Tuesday, and that is all this week! It's all really slowing down now. I think the counselors I work with are just as "burnt" out of it as I am. Oh ran to bookstore and bought cap, gown, and hood before class Monday. 70 dollars later...Ugh.

Today is a very rainy day. Jude was so sweet. Starting off reading books in the AM. I always love when he brings me one then slowly backs into my lap. So sweet. Even if it is 7 AM and my eyes are barely awake! Did our normal routine things then played downstairs for over an hour. Too funny. He acts as thought it's like Christmas every time he runs down! His eyes get huge, he squeals with excitement, charges through all the toys, and then settles for the very expected cars. Ha. Today I built our family out of Lego blocks though! I couldn't quick figure out how to create a pregnant lady so yeaaa, I'm looking nice and hot! Oh at lunch it started "booming" my code word for thunder. I don't know why I started boom. Maybe because he loves "b" words? Anyways, he's picking at his food then wait what was that?!?! "BOOOOM" Wants to jump out of his chair to see! He gets SO excited. Yeaaa I have a created a thunderstorm lover. I got him out and we ran to the front door....this is what we've always done with storms. He backs into my lap once again and we wait for the "booms." It's so cute. His excitement over the smallest things makes me happy. He may have been slightly disappointed though because there was no lightening that we could see this time. Maybe next time. He's fast asleep now, like clockwork daily at noon, and it's now my time to relax, write, read, school stuff, or just be lazy! Sometimes these 2 hours fly though :)

Run, run, run. Loves running. Maybe a runner like me?

Easter

LOVED searching for eggs out front!

3 men and a baby...

Hoppy Easter.

The Easter bunny.

Hehe, blankie!

Playing peek a boo.

He was just goofy here.

He complains and complains that this truck isn't turning "onnnnn," I run all the way upstairs, grab the batteries, and come down to replace to find that he only wants to play with the screwdriver now. Sigh.

18 weeks. Thought I'd try a different view. Flattering right?

Box Boy! Maybe he will take over SEMO box company! Watch out Poopa!

17 Weeks

Wow the end of a challenging week. 17 weeks today though! Really, this pregnancy is flying. I know I'm only 17 weeks, but nearly halfway baked. Not much to report on the fetus side. Well at class, my professor was talking about "some more something"...so I could NOT stop thinking about "smores." Yep, I combined the words but doesn't that sound great?

17 weeks. Well...I'm not sure whether I can blame my size on the massive amount of food I had last night....or that I am actually getting slightly bigger than with Jude. Who knows. Sometimes, it deflates. OR maybe it's a girl? Fetus is so very active though, all day. Pregnancy is so weird. I bought three new shirts yesterday from Old Navy. All extra small, none maternity. What was I thinking???




Yep, it is a little weird how my fetus is always compared to a fruit or vegetable. Isn't it? Well this week, a turnip. See the size variation? I anticipate our fetus to be right on track though. Or even bigger than Jude! We go in two weeks and I believe at 19 weeks the fetus should be around 1/2 lbs. That's saying pregnancy brain hasn't taken over and I actually recall that from last time.

Recently I had a dream I was Kate Middleton. How odd. Well not really, I mean we do share half of the same name. But I remember I was going out with a few people. I think it was Halloween and we were on float. Like a floating device in the water, raft like. I was debating whether to put on more makeup, but realized I didn't know how, so I left as is. I had on this beautiful white-like-wedding dress. After the raft, we got onto something more steady where we were pulled around and I waved. I felt great. I still do :)

Translation, what really went down: I was on the lawn mower while John was pushing me! I felt like the queen! I probably didn't have much makeup on b/c who does when they cut the grass! HAHA.

Home from farm first thing he wanted was for Uma to "talk." Note the hands...

Flying through Target b/c we all know that smile doesn't last long :)

I'm ashamed. But will say, another trip to Target, but no purchases either time...ears!

Found his calling...

I don't know how I missed this. Probably cleaning up dinner but noticed this....HA

He enjoys playdough. I'm teaching him now he has to say "bye bye" to one color before the next. So he waves it fair well.

I have about 3 more videos of Jude putting the shapes back in. He completed it totally. I figure I'm really the only one proud. You don't want to watch them all!!! ...do you? Most proud b/c it took me 2 months to figure out that I had to film in different sessions so I could upload this :)
Lol. So he's been doing this since 15 months!!

Yea we ran to Faust park with a friend! Saw the butterflies, said "duck" repeatedly, road the carousel (he was totally unimpressed), and played in the playground. Good times.

My love.

There mom! Do you see it! Jude was not shy to touch the butterflies...

Hehe. Buddy Olivia.

Until next week!